Checkin' things off the list

We're checking things off our list! We completed our profile book last night, all except the letters of recommendation to be added. We've received 3 letters back so far and we're waiting on the rest before we make copies of our book & send them to Little Angel Adoptions. (If we asked you to write a letter for us, we'd appreciate receiving the letter in the next week. Thank you!)
The profile book was a BIG project and a bit stressful! We're happy to have it behind us and we're trusting God to put the book in the right hands! We've also begun the first steps of our home study. We completed the application & turned in the deposit. We were assigned a social worker & we spoke with her yesterday. Tomorrow we'll be filling out individual questionnaires and turning in the remaining balance due. We'll also be getting fingerprinted. Once those things are complete, our social worker will schedule interviews & a home assessment with us. We're hoping the entire process won't take as long as it sounds like it will, but we're content to have plenty to keep us busy while we're waiting to be matched.

"Dear Birth Parent"

After signing our contract & turning in our fees, we then wrote our "Dear Birth Parent" letter. This is a letter from us to the potential birth mother of our child, sharing who we are and why we desire to be parents. (It took us HOURS to write. It's such an important task!!) Along with a picture of us, this is to be submitted for posting on the Little Angel Adoptions website. Birth moms can go to the website and browse through the waiting families and read their letters. We'll also be putting this letter in our profile book which will get sent out to any birth moms that could be a match for us. Our letter & picture was posted on the website this morning- feel free to read it! (By the way, we know the Little Angel website is ridiculously outdated & cheesy in style, however it hasn't seemed to stop them from being very successful!)

http://www.littleangeladoptions.com/ProspFams/Zach_AnneLtr.htm

"Pregnant on Paper"

We've signed the contract & turned in our money, so as Little Angel Adoptions says, we are officially "pregnant on paper"!!!! Yay!!! We're so excited to have officially begun this journey! We have a lot do now! Our first step is to write a letter to the potential birth mother & submit it along with a picture of us to be posted on the Little Angel Adoptions website. Next, we will need to collect letters of recommendation from friends & family to put in our profile book. (THANK YOU to our amazing friends & family who have been so willing to write these letters for us! It's such a big & important part of the process and we are honored to have you be a part of it!!!) We will also need to make a profile book (basically a mini-scrapbook telling all about us). This will be what gets sent to the birth mothers to look at as they make their decision for a family. Needless to say, there's a lot of pressure on making this book! Finally, we need to have a home study conducted. This simply means a social worker will come and assess our house for safety, space, health, etc. I'm grateful we have plenty to do while we wait. :-)

We've also been advised by Little Angel Adoptions to purchase a carseat & any basic necessities we might need in the event that they receive a call from a birth mom who's already had her baby & needs a family asap! Though this isn't a common occurance, it can and does happen, so we need to be prepared! It's crazy to think our lives could change that quickly!!

We'll keep you posted on our progress!

Decision made!

We met with the directors/owners of Little Angel Adoptions this morning , and the same good vibe we felt on the phone a few days ago was felt again. We had a great talk with Deb- she & her husband Jim started Little Angel Adoptions years ago and they have an obvious heart for birth mother's and the ministry of adoption. She confirmed all the things we'd been told by Kim (the adoptive parent coordinator) and she set us completely at ease. She shared lots of stories with us- all God-ordained meetings between adoptive parents & birth mothers. We realized very quickly that nothing we do can force the process to go faster or smoother but every step is an act of faith. We found this to be a big relief! We don't need to obsess over making the perfect profile book or call for updates every few days... we can relax and trust that God has the perfect child picked out for us.

So after some extensive debriefing with one another over lunch, we've decided to move forward with Little Angel Adoptions! :-) We've already completed the application & been accepted, so the next step is to read & sign the contract and pay the fee (a very little word for a very big number!). After that we'll be officially "pregnant on paper" as they say.

Next we'll write a letter to the potential birth mother & submit a picture to be posted on Little Angel's website. We'll also need to begin collecting reference letters from friends & family, create a profile book to be sent to potential birth mothers, and get a home study done. Lots lots lots to do!

We could be chosen by a birth mom in as little as a few weeks, or up to about 1 year. It's up to God! (Sometimes birth mothers call when they are in labor or have JUST delivered a child, and they want to place their baby with a family immediately! But in most cases a birth mother calls when she is a few months into her pregnancy, so we'll most likely have plenty of notice.)

Please let us know if you have any questions for us about our decision or Little Angel Adoptions!

Here's a little more info about Little Angel Adoptions for those who are interested:

-They do only domestic adoptions within the U.S. They have birth mothers from all around the country, so it's very likely we will need to travel to pick up our child!
-Only 30-35 adoptive families are kept on file. This gives each family the one-on-one attention they need during this emotional process!
-The birth mother will be given only 10-15 profile books to look through, all families who fit what she's looking for & vice versa.
-It is VERY rare for a birth mother to change her mind about relinquishing her child for adoption once she's been matched with a family. (Once the child has been b0rn & discharged from the hospital, the adoption will be finalized & the birth parents rights will be terminated.)
-The majority of birth mother's request a semi-open or closed adoption. (Zach & I are comfortable with both options.)
-A casual relationship between the birth mother & adoptive parents is encouraged before the child is born, but only 5% of families actually meet the birth mother before she delivers.
-We will be given access to the birth mother's medical records from her pre-natal care visits, the baby's medical records, as well as any family medical history that is known.

Gettin' a Good Vibe

So after a very emotional few days of processing what we learned from Lilliput, we called up Little Angels Adoptions. I (Anne) spoke with the Adoptive Parent Coordinator for half an hour & got many of my questions answered. She was so easy to talk to and set me completely at ease. She adopted her son through Little Angels and then took a job with them shortly after. She was very honest about her experience and really encouraged me. All the information we've gained so far are things we both feel very comfortable with. Just after that first call we got a very good vibe, as opposed to the heart sinking feeling we felt with Lilliput. So we've set up a meeting with Little Angels for this Friday morning. Please pray for discernment & that God would give us peace about the course we should take.

Last night we also had the pleasure of having dinner with the Marshi family. Holly & Bassel Marshi attend our church and they recently adopted 7 yr. old Bailey through Lilliput. We had a wonderful time getting to know their family & hearing their story. It was so refreshing to meet another family who can give us support & enouragement through this process. (Thank you Holly & Bassel!!!)

A Bit Overwhelmed...

Thank you to those of you who prayed for us during our orientation meeting with Lilliput! We were given A LOT of information last night and we're still processing it all. We talked some things out with Zach's parents who attended the meeting with us and we took a detour on our way home to Big Spoon Yogurt. We felt a little dessert would make the decision making process a bit easier. :-)
The "reality checks" we heard at the event last weekend were confirmed at the Lilliput meeting. The entire process from start to finish could take up to 2 years. We were made very aware of the risks we would take in adopting a 0-12month old. There is a good chance the child's birth parent(s) will fight for reunification and they will have 6-12 months to do so, even after the child has been placed in our home. The thought of bonding with a sweet baby only to have them taken away from us is almost too much to handle. It is also mandated by the state that we arrange regular visits between the child & their birth parent(s) during the fostering period... we're not entirely comfortable with that. We also learned that when adopting an infant there is a VERY good chance they have been exposed to prenatal drug or alcohol abuse which results in health problems.
These are all things we will be willing & able to take on if the Lord leads us to, however we feel it's best to see what our other options are before committing to such a difficult journey. We were referred to an independent adoption agency called "Little Angel Adoptions" here in Sacramento. They set up adoption with pregnant mothers who are relinquishing their baby-to-be. The chance of having an unhealthy child is greatly reduced, and the adoption is finalized the moment the child is placed with us- so no temporary foster care. The big risk, of course, is that the birth mom could change her mind at any point during her pregnancy. This would be difficult, but at least we won't have bonded with the child yet, so the burden would be lessened. We'll set up a meeting with Little Angel Adoptions and make our decision after that.
We're a little disheartened as we were hoping to have a clearly known path after last night's meeting. We feel it's important to take our time in making sure we're choosing the best fit though, and God will get us through it!

"Home For Good" Event re-cap

We're on information overload after today's adoption event! From 9am to 1pm we heard anything & everything about adoption, including testimonies (which were VERY emotional), introductional workshops, etc. We met up with several friends of ours from church who were either interested in adoption like us, or were simply supporting the cause. It was reassuring to see familiar faces on such a big day for us!

The workshop was very informative and gave us a very big reality check as far as what we're getting ourselves into! We knew of course this process would not be easy, but we certainly feel we've had our eyes completely opened to the obstacles that may lay ahead. We're still confident the Lord is leading us to adopt, but how clear the path will be to get there is no longer certain. We need our faith to kick in... big time. :-)

We were able to meet a representative from Lilliput & hear a lot more about their company, all good things (yay!). We were also introduced to Sierra Forever Families, an adoption agency very similar to Lilliput as far as their focus, values & procedures. We may attend an orientation meeting with them as well, just to compare & contrast so as to make an informed decision.

We have a lot to think & pray about as we prepare for our orientation with Lilliput this coming Thursday. Thank you to those of you who are continually praying for us as we start this journey! We appreciate your support SO very much!